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"What's your problem?"

Updated: Nov 28, 2022

The Trans-People Conversation.


I'd like to start the conversation off by saying that this is going to piss you off if you feel that "Trans Women are Women ; Trans Men are Men"

Recently, I've been getting messages from my spirit to my throat chakra. I have never experienced this consistent need to KEEP talking.

As a child, I would speak and be told that it was either none of my business or that I talk too much but it wouldn't exactly stop me from expressing myself....I started doing that myself when I got to HS because I felt intimidated by everyone and everything.

Back then the only times my throat would hurt is from holding back as many tears as I could to prevent the "feeling of weakness" - because although I had valid reasons to cry, and it was cathartic to do so, I always viewed it as a form of weakness.

I still don't like to cry but I don't fight it now and I don't view it as weakness anymore.

I've been a spineless doormat for as long as I can remember. Unable to speak up for myself but quick to do it for others and ready to fight for the ones I love but never for myself. I COULDN'T show up for myself because I didn't know HOW to just be me without feeling like I was wrong for being me.

At this point, you're probably thinking "wtf does any of this have to do with the conversation?"

I hear you, I'm getting there -#TrustTheProcess

Many of us go through a process as we grow up where we want to be accepted and so we do and say things we think will get us to be accepted but they don't always sit well within us because it's not necessarily what we actually think....we just want THEM to think we think that way....

The ideal is that we get to a point in life where we stop giving a flying phuck about acceptance and we begin to embrace the need for peace within ourselves, respect in our interpersonal relationships, and to not care about those who do not care about/for least, that's the point in life where I am now - post-HS, post-undergrad, post-pregnancy, Late 20s....IM IN MY LATE PHUCKING TWENTIES! - good God almighty 😩🙏🏾 #Blessed

Aight so boom-

When I was in middle school, (11/12 years old) I started walking up and down the hallways when people were in class doing the pimp walk -

Extra exaggerated, walking with a limp and no cane. I was "practicing" what I wanted to do when I got older. I began to put on a more masculine energy changing the way I communicated and interacted with my peers in different settings: in church I was a boisterous lady, in school I was a "good little christian girl", at home I was a "loud-mouthed know-it-all" - so although I felt like I was trying to be more "masculine" people would never see it that way - it just seemed like 'me' to them...and...I guess, I WAS just being me, I was just operating under the belief that because I wasn't a girly girl, and because I was a tomboy that I was "masculine"

I always dressed with whatever was bought for me and it typically was not dresses, skirts and flowery or glittery shxt - it was usually the basics and often hand-me-downs from my brother or others. I didn't have a sense of "style" per se- it was just a matter of finding clothing that fit me.

I began experiencing an attraction to a young lady (at around 12/13) who was very near and dear to my heart at that time. She was there for me when I really needed that feminine energy. You see, my mom was killed 10 days before my 10th birthday. And once that happened, something happened to my brain: pitch-blackness was all I saw as I cried for 24hours straight. How TF was I supposed to wrap my head around these facts at 9 years old:

A) my mother is dead.

B) I just saw her the night before and now she's not alive anymore.

C) not only is SHE dead, but it's my first experience with death.

D) oh shxt - I'm going to die one day too


All this background knowledge to give you an idea of what I was doing and what I was dealing with as I have grown into the woman I am today.


So that was my closest experience with feeling "gender dysphoria". I don't suppose that that experience is enough to have the community put their guards down and understand the perspective of everyone who doesn't accept their lifestyle.

And yes- it is a lifestyle. Just like being a gym rat, a husband/wife, or "rich auntie". It is a matter of decisions made in your life based on your feelings....that the style in which you live your life. These are choices we make to live our lives in these ways.

Masculinity is something I, as a female, had to "practice" in order for it to be "believable".

Femininity is something you, as a male, have to "practice" in order for it to be "believable".


There is a young man that lives in my neighborhood whom I remember became a vagabond around 15y/o. There is something not right about this kid in the head and I only spoke with him once. I can tell by the way he moves about in our neighborhood and from that one conversation we had where he asked me to borrow $1. He's about 19y/o now and still walks up and down our block, every day, doing nothing but either smoking or looking for money to smoke and on YouTube.

I bring this young man up because he has his moments, where he's walking on his tippy toes, as if he has heels on, listening to Beyonce and Nicki Minaj, swinging his hips something crazy. And other days he's walking regularly, with the little swag that dudes with confidence be walking with. As I seen this happen over the past 4 years or so, I never thought - he's going to want to become a woman - I just thought he was gonna be gay, if he wasn't already.

There is a young lady in my neighborhood that I knew would potentially change. She lives a building or so over and I've seen her playing with the other neighborhood kids since she was 8/9, when she was still too small to ride the big bikes, you would see her confidently zoom past everyone standing while pedaling to ensure she reached. But as I saw her interact, I thought she would probably grow to have some kind of issues with femininity (if she didn't already). And sure enough- shorty must be about 15 now and she got a fade with a line up and only wears men's clothing. And I get it, they're a lot more comfortable that lady clothes, especially all the skimpy shxt that is available to us compared to the comfortable things available to men.

There is a young adult whom I met, through their roommate, as Brenda who is now Brendon. I haven't seen them since before their transition, so I'm sure I wouldnt recognize them at all.


So what exactly is your problem with the Trans community?

I have a problem with males trying to normalize their weird behavior and expecting women to simply, and blindly, agree with them.

I have a problem with the fact that the young lady I mentioned, should she mention anything negative about her reproductive process, she could be guided towards unnecessary bodily mutilation and increased potential for sterilization.

I have a problem with males who proport themselves to be women, saying that they are better than biological (real) women because of their inability to reproduce. "Because there are men who don't want to have kids" they are better for them than bio-women.

I have a HUGE issue with males, who WILL NEVER KNOW what going through life as a female REALLY is like. They cannot be women if they have not gone through our right of passage: menstruation. The blood our body releases monthly to allow for our bodies to be a womb that helps create and fully sustains new life & The hormonal and emotional swings that come as a result.

I have a HUGE problem with females, who WILL NEVER KNOW what going through life as a male is REALLY like. They cannot be men if they have not gone through their right of passage: sperm auto-production.

The first time their balls fill with sperm to the point that they have to let it out and every day after that. They don't have to deal with testosterone and adrenaline coursing through their veins and needing to keep that tame except in certain situations.

I have a problem with people disregarding scientific knowledge entirely based of their feelings because they are expecting those feelings to be validated to the point of making laws to do so.

It's a no for me, Dawg

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